CATCHING FEELINGS – #1
How do you know when you are catching feelings? Is there a bell that goes off in your head announcing the herald of new emotions?
Or do you just know in your gut that something has changed?
“Hey, your writing is breathtaking. Sometimes I read the things you write and I have to remind myself to suck in air. You are that good. Also, you mentioned in the mail that you haven’t eaten yet because of the day you’ve had. I hope you’ve eaten now. (Your fans still need you alive)
Thank you for sharing this. Couldn’t have been easy
This was the first thing I ever sent to her and not a single word of it was a lie.
It was in response to her newsletter and I don’t for the life of me know why she doesn’t send them every day.
With these letters, it’s ‘try your luck’. The same thing with her blog posts, it’s just vibes. Somedays, you wait and yearn for something and nothing. Then there are days like today when she decides to bless us with her gift.
But I am not complaining. I will read anything she writes at any time of the day.
Before I sent that though, I edited and re-edited and deleted and modified before closing my eyes and finally hitting send.
It is not that I am in love with her or anything.
I just admire her a whole lot.
Well, I shouldn’t say it like that because we don’t necessarily know each other. We are not friends. I follow her on every social media platform but I am sure she’s entirely unaware of my existence.
My phone vibrates in my hand.
This made me smile. Thank you for replying. Your responses give me joy and keep me going.
Oh and yes, I have eaten now”
My heart stopped in my chest. She replied.
Well, what was I thinking? Of course she replied.
She’s the kind of person who takes out time to respond to everybody.
It’s part of her appeal, like the sunshine, you cannot ignore it.
She’s not the in your face kind of beautiful.
Hers is different.
There is something about her that draws you in, you get to know her and you’re enraptured by all that she is.
This shining thing comes naturally to her and she is not even aware of it.
How do you cause so much havoc and not notice it?
How do you capture hearts in a single sweep and be unaware of the power that you possess?
Her smile is the highlight. She smiles and your heart does summersaults in your chest.
Her smile is the kind that can make you smile even if you were having a bad day.
It is the kind that makes men lose their sanity and go the millionth mile. It is smiles like hers that provoke promises like “I will walk on broken glass for you” because, even me, I will do anything, cross any length just to see it spread across her face and stay there.
I think of her response and smile.
Should I respond again? Or am I pushing it?
I decide against it. I will leave it. This is enough for today.
Ten minutes later, against my better judgment, I change my mind and type out a response.
“Can’t believe you responded. On behalf of your fans, we’re glad you ate. Looking forward to the next newsletter. Goodnight.”
I drop my phone and go to bed.
Because the way my heart is doing gbim gbim in my chest, I cannot wait for a reply.
If I perish, I perish.
Click here to read the next part. https://evadiaries.com.ng/2020/05/08/catching-feelings-2-hard-guy/